Kite Flying Banned. Ponies Pissed.

Toronto has banned kite flying in Milliken Park, and we’re bucking mad.

Courtesy of Google Images

Councillor Chin Lee has single-handedly banned kite flying from Milliken Park (Scarborough) – apparently because of kite string litter. Anyone who breaks this law will now pay a fine of $100. Call us crazy, but aren’t there slightly more cigarette butts, gum packets, and plastic wrappers polluting our streets than kite strings? After nearly protesting by blanketing the park with tampon strings, we instead decided to take a deep breath and turn to our trusty steed. After all, the pony is mightier than the sword.

Mazhar Hussain is just one of the many protesters attempting to work with Lee on changing this new law. “We can go around and start picking up litter. We’re willing to do whatever you say. But there has to be a place where we can go, take our families, fly kites and have a barbecue” he stated. Not exactly a far-fetched demand – this is Canada we’re in, right? The only other people we know who ban kites are the Taliban.

But Lee brushed him off, responding with: “we have to sit down with all the stakeholders and then talk to the community around us to come up with a solution.” He also admitted earlier in the week how he hadn’t consulted the group before the ban was brought in. Slightly hypocritical, but then again, so are all politicians with half a brain.

The other issue being brought up is that kite strings can harm “people and birds” (as The Star reported). Now, besides mass murderers using kite strings as choke wire, we’re not sure how people can get hurt. And birds, well, we should really be taking down all those skyscrapers and sliding glass doors then. For safety purposes.

Excuse our sarcasm, but we’d sooner use that to express our rage than a series of swear words in capital letters. It’s also painfully ironic that the acronym for Lee’s organization, the Scarborough Needs Accountable Politicians, is simply known as SNAP. All he’s missing is an “Oh,” in front of it and he’ll be an honest man.

Discussions between the two sides begin today, but for now the only activities you’ll see in the park are frisbee and red rover – until those get banned too.

–The Cowgirls.