Thank Him Later. Much, Much Later.

An album review of Toronto’s own, Drake: Thank Me Later.

Courtesy of Google Images

Being famous is hard. That’s the message Drake hammers into the listener as he blathers on about the difficulties of being able to make it rain coin like Mario headbutting a question mark. Normalcy seems to have escaped him, as evidenced with lyrics such as ‘Niggaz wit no money act like money isn’t everything’. Funny, last time we checked, it was. Flaunting his hefty pockets, teasing those less fortunate, and talking about ‘stacking dollars to the perfect height’, Drake should seriously consider spending less time constructing scale model towers of money, and spend more time buying drugs. Because for someone stuck ‘throwing hundreds when he should be throwing ones’, a solid injection of reality might do this architect some good.

A cavalcade of rap stars have guest features on Drake’s debut album such as Nicki Minaj, who quips ‘Fuck I look like ho? I look like yes and you look like no’. Though unable to find the correlation between Nicki Minaj and the word ‘Yes’, we believe there’s something to Minaj’s claim, if one were to look up ‘yes’ on a Google image search they’d find this:

Courtesy of Google Images

Lil Wayne, Young Money Entertainment mate and current darling of the weed and pill-popping industry, pops up on the album as well. Wayne shows growth and maturity on his guest feature, rapping: “I walk light so I don’t piss the ground off”. Most would ignore the ground’s plight; but not Wayne. Not this time. Such fine artistic achievements must be akin to watching Van Gough paint, or Adriana Lima exist.

Drake could have been the leader of rap’s new wave if it were not for one glaring character flaw – the guy’s a huge pussy. He’s also one of those rappers who raps about rapping; constantly droning on about how much time he spends on his music, and how good he is at being a rapper. In fact, it’s such a disturbing reality that not one person was harmed in the making of this album. It’s this disgusting trend that has put hip-hop in the state it’s in today. His stubborn reluctance to discuss anything “hood” is disappointing, and it’s not like he couldn’t do it, for Christ’s sake the man was wheelchair bound from a gunshot wound!

Hopefully, when Drake’s next album comes out, the online reception will be slightly better. But until then we’ll just have to thank him later.

– Andy Itwaru